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Old 10-21-2013, 06:28 AM
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seeking good advice on a divorce

Since I have been married for 6 year's I have drifted away from all friends and have no one to talk to about ehat I should do so here it goes. About three months ago my wife woke up on a Sunday morning and walked into the living room like every Sunday but there was something different. She looked lost like she had no clue where she was at she didn't ask our 4 year old son or me what we wanted to eat she just set there and stared at nothing. Her four favorite things to do were taking care of our son taking care of me cooking and cleaning but that all stopped. I asked her every day what was wrong she said nothing but she completely turn into a different person overnight when we went to bed the night before everything is fine. After about 3 week's I again asked her what was on her mind and she said I'm going to tell you the truth and this is when life as the 3 of us new it changed she siad to me ( I f*@#'n hate you and I don't no why) I was shocked we have been best friends and lovers for 9 years. The next thing I know I'm sighing devorce papers what should I do
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Old 10-21-2013, 06:44 AM
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You should worry 100 percent about your kid. I don't know what your living status is right now like who has your son, who is in the house, who has to leave but the important thing about this is that you need to make a comfortable and stable living place for your son because he can sense and realize what's going on. I'm sorry if I'm telling you stuff you already know/ put into consideration, I'm just telling you what I think. You might want to look into your parents or siblings who may live around..
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Old 10-21-2013, 07:17 AM
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To me it looks like a classic case of MAJOR depression. I know first hand how bad it can get. They don't know why they feel the way they do and it can come out of nowhere and at times they're fine one minute and the next is "who the hełł is this b**ch?". IDK, maybe talk to someone that is real close to her that your ex-wife would listen to and see if they have seen a change in her also. Try to get her to see a doctor, preferably a psychiatrist, as there are a LOT of medications out there that can make a WORLD of a difference, it just may take time to find the right one at the right dosage. BIGGEST hurdle is to get them to realize that depression is a DISEASE and NOT a personal weakness. I KNOW its hard but keep trying to be there for her, be her friend, don't push the depression idea, just wonder out loud about it, and maybe you guys can get help as a family. Best of luck, just remember this will take time.


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Old 10-21-2013, 07:20 AM
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he is my biggest concern he has completely changed he lives with his mom at her parents house they talk to me all the time they say he doesn't listen to a thing that she or they say to him but thankfully when it comes to my house he listens just fine but he acts completely different and I hate that
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Old 10-21-2013, 07:29 AM
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Yeah he knows what's up. Term3 is right also I didn't even think about it like that I was just thinking about the kid. Will she talk to you or is it just unpleasant when she does?

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Old 10-21-2013, 07:29 AM
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Children usually have the strongest bond with the same sex parent. Your son doesn't understand why things are different and no amount of explaining is going make them understand as their minds are too young to process it. He's angry because mommy made his happy world change and you can bet he can tell the difference in her and that just adds to his frustration which comes out as bad behaviour.


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Old 10-21-2013, 07:33 AM
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I'll tell you in the beginning I knew it was depression or hormones because a couple years ago she had surgery and the doctor told us that this would happen he said when I'm did she needed to call but like any depressed person she think she has nothing wrong but to me to stop treating your kid the way you did before there has to be something wrong
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Old 10-21-2013, 09:41 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jtf350 View Post
I'll tell you in the beginning I knew it was depression or hormones because a couple years ago she had surgery and the doctor told us that this would happen he said when I'm did she needed to call but like any depressed person she think she has nothing wrong but to me to stop treating your kid the way you did before there has to be something wrong
Is she willing to sit down and talk about it? Maybe with her mom or something if they're close like that?

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Old 10-21-2013, 10:16 AM
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I've talked to her and of course she says there's nothing wrong with her her mom noticed it her mom tried to talk her into going to the doctor and she says I'm not giving in to him l will not go
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Old 10-21-2013, 01:10 PM
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I don't really know much about depression but can it make a woman hate the man she has loved for over 6 years, and make her say I am the worst husband and father in the world. I know I don't deserve an award but we got along perfectly we have never even had any kind of fight or argument she was the best wife and best mother in the world and she acutely woke up one morning the compete opposite of who she really is. but if she really was unhappy I hope she finds what she is looking for but I don't think that's the case because I don't think she would put our sons needs and wants aside like she did. all of our friends that are close to us she wont speak to but they all keep telling me not to give up on her but I feel if you really love someone you have to let them go as much as I hate to that's the only thing I know to do any advice would be appreciated if more details are needed just ask
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