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Old 09-25-2012, 11:09 AM
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Mother in Law a deal Breaker for Marriage?

So a little back story. Me and my girlfriend have been dating for 2 years. I'm 26 and shes 25. I'm deploying to Egypt next year and we plan to get married when I get home. Deal is her mother in law is very materialistic and gives us **** about getting married saying we aren't ready and she wont support it yet her son is getting married (he's 28) and she's completely on board. We thought my gf was pregnant earlier this year (false alarm) and we told her mother and she absolutely flipped out. This woman thinks that the world revolves around her and it extremely rude. My parents met her and didn't like her from the get go. My mom said she has never felt so belittled in her life by a person. Thing is her dad and brother are awesome and love me to death. My gf is nothing like her mother. She is the coolest chick Ive ever met. She's beautiful smart successful hunts fishes and is like one of the guys. But her mother has got me rethinking marriage. Should her mother in law be a deal breaker? Just getting some outside perspective.
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Old 09-25-2012, 11:19 AM
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For me, it really depends on how close she is to her mother and how close you guys are going to live to them. Even if she is close to her mother, but you guys are going to be living at least 6 hours away, then it will be fine once you only see her once or twice a year. So, how tight knit of a family are they?
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Old 09-25-2012, 11:30 AM
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Are you sure your not talking about my mother in law?? Sounds just like her too it's crazy. Just do what I did and tell her mother to **** off!! It worked for me lol.
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Old 09-25-2012, 11:32 AM
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Or you could do what I did and bang the mother! Lol Jk =D
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Old 09-25-2012, 12:06 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dieselmatt View Post
For me, it really depends on how close she is to her mother and how close you guys are going to live to them. Even if she is close to her mother, but you guys are going to be living at least 6 hours away, then it will be fine once you only see her once or twice a year. So, how tight knit of a family are they?
They are close but her mother gets on her nerves. I was going to take a fire fighter position right across the river in Indiana (we live in KY) because her mom says I need a "career" So I applied for the job and told her we'd have to move 20 minutes away to the next town and her mother told me I could move but her daughter would not be going with me!!! We live about 15 minutes away from her now.
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Old 09-25-2012, 12:10 PM
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wait wait wait... Does she mean that after you get married, her daughter still can't move far or just now.



EDIT:
Actually, IT DOESNT MATTER!!! She is 25... not a child anymore and can make her own decisions!!!
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Old 09-25-2012, 12:36 PM
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I agree with dieselmatt, if you're living a distance away, it may not be that big of a deal.

Some questions about your girlfriend: (just asking questions, please don't take it that I'm trying to diss the GF)
Is you GF like her Mother?
Does she exhibit the same things?
What does she think about what her mother does?
Is it possible that if you do marry your GF, would the MIL settle down?

For you:
How much do you love ths girl? So much that it really doesn't matter what her Mom is like? Enough that you will be able to set some boundaries with the MIL once you do get married? If you did attempt to set some boundaries, would the GF/wife side with you -or- her mother?
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Old 09-25-2012, 05:30 PM
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Originally Posted by Tuscany View Post
Are you sure your not talking about my mother in law?? Sounds just like her too it's crazy. Just do what I did and tell her mother to **** off!! It worked for me lol.
This

I had it the worse with my in MIL. She is kinda of well no she is racist. I'm black and my wife is hispanic and her mom was all bent out of shape about it. I told her mom "Look im not marrying you. I'm marrying your daughter. If you dont like me that is fine but your daughter and I love each other and that is that." Although she wont talk to either of us atleast we dont have to worry about the mean remarks and her talking on our relationship. Good luck OP if you guys are truly in love then nobody can tear you guys apart.
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Old 09-25-2012, 05:38 PM
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I totally feel your pain. When my wife's mother found out we were getting married she didn't talk to my wife for a year. From what you said it seems like you really love this girl.Let her mom be a ***** all she wants, all you can do is prove her wrong. Your never gonna find someone without some sort of issues.
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Old 10-22-2012, 12:53 PM
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i never had any major issues with my mother in law, except the fact that my wifes dad works his *** off every day, and she blows through his money like a crackhead.

we live about 45 minutes from my wifes parents, only see them a couple times a month, but THANK GOD she is nothing like her mother. shes down to earth, loves performance vehicles (ive had around 20 cars since i was 16, none have EVER been stock), and is an absolute budget nazi. shes about 5ft-4in tall and 100lbs, but she can hold her own. not to mention the first time i took her to the firing range (she had never even held a gun), her accuracy scared me.

if you can ignore the MIL, and know your girl is the one, dont let her slip away because of a psycho MIL. once youre married, she can KISS YOUR ***.
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