Inlaws are the worst
So grab a drink because this is gonna be a long one.
So, I've usually gotten along with my girlfriend's dad, even though he still hangs out with her ex. Her sister hates me, her brother thinks I'm awesome, and her mom didn't like me, but now she totally loves me. Sarah (my girlfriend)'s parents are divorced.
I wasn't there for this, but I got the same story from 3 different people. So yesterday her sister was having a baby shower and giving a tour of their new house. Sarah's sister's babydaddy (she's got 2 kids with this guy while she's married to some other guy who she hasn't seen in 3 or 4 years), so the babydaddy has a statue of one of the saints on his dresser, and Sarah loved this kind of stuff. She made a remark to her brother about "he must watch over them while they sleep". So kevin, the babydaddy blows up. He gets in her face cussing and screaming about how she shouldn't be joking about this stuff. Now her sister and her mother did tell him off. And her brother told him he was lucky I wasn't there. Sarah left, and that was that.
So when I hear about it, I'm upset. Sarah's dad emails me asking about what happened and I give him the stories that I heard. I'm under the assumption that he's going to be upset that this dude yelled and cussed at his daughter. He basically says "oh well as long as he didn't hit her". Then he goes into some long diatribe about how the divorce messed everyone up and then goes on to say that when Sarah and I got together she stopped talking to her family and I basically kept her from them. This couldn't be further from the truth, I'm actually the one who tells her to call and visit and all that crap.
So I just decided to put it all out there. I let him know that they treated me like crap from day one. Even though when someone needed help, we were the one's to call. He needed $1,000 for something I don't remember what. John and his bank account to the rescue. Just 3 months ago Sarah's sister needed $3,000 so they could get their new house. Guess who wrote the check. So even after all of this, I'm told that it's basically my fault because I'm a jerk. I broke up Sarah and her ex and ruined her life and I keep her from her family.
And that beating the crap out of the sister's man is the wrong thing to do and that I should invite him out for drinks and talk it out.
My reply was basically, if I'd had my nuts cut off I would share his sentiment about the d-bag babydaddy. And that Sarah is a grown woman and she can come and go as she pleases. She can call and visit whomever she wants. But as far as me being at any of their family holidays, it won't happen. I will have zero contact with them. And I would like to be paid back within 30 days.
So if you've read all of that here's my question. Should I leave things as they are which I'm happy with. Or should I forgive and forget, even though it will result on me being treated like an outsider?