Americans with "NO" Disability Act - Ford Powerstroke Diesel Forum
Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
post #1 of 16 Old 06-09-2009, 03:18 AM Thread Starter
Serving Our Country!

 
Firemanbill's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Yorktown, VA
Posts: 1,007
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Americans with "NO" Disability Act

probably should be in the Humor section but it sounds like this could actually happen, no wait, it really is happening!

Americans With No Abilities Act


Washington, DC -

President Barack Obama and the Democrat controlled Congress is considering
sweeping legislation that will provide new benefits for many Americans.
The Americans With No Abilities Act. AWNAA is being hailed as a major
legislative goal by advocates of the millions of Americans who lack any
real skills or ambition.

'Roughly 50 percent of Americans do not possess the competence and drive
necessary to carve out a meaningful role for themselves in society,' said
California Senator Barbara Boxer. 'We can no longer stand by and allow
People of Inability to be ridiculed and passed over. With this
legislation, employers will no longer be able to grant special favors to a
small group of workers, simply because they have some idea of what they
are doing.'

In a Capitol Hill press conference, House Majority Leader Nancy Pelosi and
Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid pointed to the success of the U.S.
Postal Service, which has a long-standing policy of providing opportunity
without regard to performance. Approximately 74 percent of postal
employees lack any job skills, making this agency the single largest U.S
employer of Persons of Inability.

Private-sector industries with good records of non-discrimination against
the Inept include retail sales (72%), the airline industry (68%), and home
improvement 'warehouse' stores (65%). At the state government level, the
Department of Motor Vehicles also has an excellent record of hiring
Persons of Inability (63%).

Under The Americans With No Abilities Act, more than 25 million 'middle
man' positions will be created, with important-sounding titles but little
real responsibility, thus providing an illusory sense of purpose and
performance.

Mandatory non-performance-based raises and promotions will be given so as
to guarantee upward mobility for even the most unremarkable employees. The
legislation provides substantial tax breaks to corporations that promote a
significant number of Persons of Inability into middle-management
positions, and gives a tax credit to small and medium-sized businesses
that agree to hire one clueless worker for every two talented hires.

Finally, the AWNAA contains tough new measures to make it more difficult
to discriminate against the non-abled, banning, for example,
discriminatory interview questions such as, 'Do you have any skills or
experience that relate to this job?'

'As a Non-abled person, I can't be expected to keep up with people who
have something going for them,' said Mary Lou Gertz, who lost her position
as a lug-nut twister at the GM plant in Flint , Michigan, due to her
inability to remember 'rightey tightey, lefty loosey.' 'This new law
should be real good for people like me,' Gertz added.

With the passage of this bill, Gertz and millions of other untalented
citizens will finally see a light at the end of the tunnel.

Said Senator Dick Durbin (D-IL): 'As a Senator with no abilities, I
believe the same privileges that elected officials enjoy ought to be
extended to every American with no abilities. It is our duty as lawmakers
to provide each and every American citizen, regardless of his or her
inadequacy, with some sort of space to take up in this great nation and a
good salary for doing so.

2004 6.0L Automatic F-250 XLT Lariat Crew Cab short bed 2wd. Reese Signature Series 16k 5th wheel hitch. Airlift Loadlifter 5000 airbags with onboard compressor.



Firemanbill is offline  
post #2 of 16 Old 06-09-2009, 04:01 AM
Compression Ignition Addict
 
benjamin24's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 1,128
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Thats the funniest f****ng thing I've ever read...or maybe should I say the scariest because it's happening right before our very eyes.

09 Lariat Ultimate/Spartan/
AFE SS Exhaust/AFE Stage II/
Weathertech/Cervinis/Toyo/UWS


benjamin24 is offline  
post #3 of 16 Old 06-09-2009, 04:17 AM
Member
 
New6.0PSOwner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: West Union, SC
Posts: 35
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
snopes.com: Urban Legends Reference Pages says this is false.


2006 F250 Crew Cab Short Bed 4X2
Cat Delete
ZooDad Mod
A.R.E. Tonneau Cover
New6.0PSOwner is offline  
post #4 of 16 Old 06-09-2009, 04:39 AM
Infidel

 
TexasR.N.'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Texas
Posts: 5,166
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Quote:
Originally Posted by New6.0PSOwner View Post
I didn't bother with snopes, but did find it on a couple of other sites as a spoof. Here's one:
Joke - Jokes WareHouse

Now I wouldn't be surprised a bit if the any of the goof balls in D.C. saw this and thought "what a great idea..........."

Craig

Remember Ft. Hood

And never forget who did it

Religion of peace my жопа


Quote:
Originally Posted by JK23112 View Post

Ah, we can lead a man to knowledge.....but we can't make him think.
TexasR.N. is offline  
post #5 of 16 Old 06-09-2009, 05:12 AM
Unapologetically American


 
2006PSDSD's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Littleton, Colorado
Posts: 20,007
Thanks: 4
Thanked 27 Times in 26 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Quoted: 19 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 4 reviews
Holy crap, I'm glad that's a joke. My blood started to boil AGAIN, but like Craig said, I could see this ridiculous idea coming to fruition


2006 F350 SOLD
* KMC XD Monsters wrapped in Hankook ATM's
* 08 style mirrors
* 4" TB exhaust
* SCT X2 with Gearhead, PHP and ID tunes
* Edge Insight CTS
*Full Bulletproof Diesel kit with remote oil cooler
* Blue FPR spring
* 6.4 Banjos
* Repaired FICM by BPD
* Dfuser coolant filter
* Stage1 MTW turbo



New truck has a Cummins and a handshaker
2006PSDSD is offline  
post #6 of 16 Old 06-09-2009, 08:28 AM Thread Starter
Serving Our Country!

 
Firemanbill's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Yorktown, VA
Posts: 1,007
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Quote:
Originally Posted by New6.0PSOwner View Post

You honesty thought that was real??? OF COURSE IT'S A SPOOF


That is why in my original post I put it should be in the HUMOR SECTION!

2004 6.0L Automatic F-250 XLT Lariat Crew Cab short bed 2wd. Reese Signature Series 16k 5th wheel hitch. Airlift Loadlifter 5000 airbags with onboard compressor.



Firemanbill is offline  
post #7 of 16 Old 06-09-2009, 08:30 AM
Unapologetically American


 
2006PSDSD's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Littleton, Colorado
Posts: 20,007
Thanks: 4
Thanked 27 Times in 26 Posts
Mentioned: 1 Post(s)
Quoted: 19 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 4 reviews
Quote:
Originally Posted by Firemanbill View Post
You honesty thought that was real??? OF COURSE IT'S A SPOOF


That is why in my original post I put it should be in the HUMOR SECTION!
With this administration, you never know


2006 F350 SOLD
* KMC XD Monsters wrapped in Hankook ATM's
* 08 style mirrors
* 4" TB exhaust
* SCT X2 with Gearhead, PHP and ID tunes
* Edge Insight CTS
*Full Bulletproof Diesel kit with remote oil cooler
* Blue FPR spring
* 6.4 Banjos
* Repaired FICM by BPD
* Dfuser coolant filter
* Stage1 MTW turbo



New truck has a Cummins and a handshaker
2006PSDSD is offline  
post #8 of 16 Old 06-09-2009, 08:34 AM
Compression Ignition Addict
 
JakeLewis79's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Pleasant Plains, IL
Posts: 735
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Quote:
Originally Posted by Firemanbill View Post
Said Senator Dick Durbin (D-IL): 'As a Senator with no abilities, I
believe the same privileges that elected officials enjoy ought to be
extended to every American with no abilities. It is our duty as lawmakers
to provide each and every American citizen, regardless of his or her
inadequacy, with some sort of space to take up in this great nation and a
good salary for doing so.


Wait, , I live in IL and these idiots around me just reelected him.

Please put a light
on the flag you fly at night.


Late 99 F350 CC 4x4 6sp
Muffler delete, superchips, White Tailgate on red truck mod

FOR SALE: 2001 Ducati ST4. $2500
JakeLewis79 is offline  
post #9 of 16 Old 06-09-2009, 08:44 AM
Compression Ignition Addict
 
symbols's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Pasadena, TX
Posts: 6,505
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 1 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Scary thing is that this has been happening in some shape or form for many years

Jason

"Using a thug's murderous rampage to call for gun control is like using Barack's reckless spending to call for higher taxes."

--Michael Berry, American philosophizer & Talk Radio Czar, 1970-?
symbols is offline  
post #10 of 16 Old 06-09-2009, 09:05 AM
Member
 
New6.0PSOwner's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: West Union, SC
Posts: 35
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Quote:
Originally Posted by Firemanbill View Post
You honesty thought that was real??? OF COURSE IT'S A SPOOF


That is why in my original post I put it should be in the HUMOR SECTION!
No I did not think it was real but your original quote said "no wait, it really is happening"


2006 F250 Crew Cab Short Bed 4X2
Cat Delete
ZooDad Mod
A.R.E. Tonneau Cover
New6.0PSOwner is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the Ford Powerstroke Diesel Forum forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode



Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome