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  #1  
Old 04-27-2008, 10:44 PM
I have excessive flatulance!!
 
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Husband 1.0

Dear IT Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the flower, gifts and jewellery applications that had operated flawlessly under boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs such as Formula One 5.0, NBA 3.0 and World Cup 2.0.

And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I’ve tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate Housewife

************************************************** ****
Dear Desperate Housewife,

First keep in mind: Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Try entering the command C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0. If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Late Night Kebab 6.1. Late Night Kebab 6.1 is a very bad program that will create FartingLoudly.wav files.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Tasty Food 3.0 and Tongue Kisses 6.9.

Good Luck,
IT Support
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  #2  
Old 04-30-2008, 11:54 AM
I have excessive flatulance!!
 
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Guess no one got it
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  #3  
Old 04-30-2008, 11:57 AM
KVFD
 

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Thats a good one!!! You have to read it like softwear i guess
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  #4  
Old 04-30-2008, 12:05 PM
Compression Ignition Addict
 

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note: there is an add-on for Husband 1.0 that was created to help with all these problems. It's called powerstroke. it comes in many diff versions, the best versions are 7.3, 6.0, and 6.4.
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  #5  
Old 04-30-2008, 12:14 PM
Compression Ignition Addict
 

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you should of put it in diesel terms like 7.3 and 6.0 and when he's not doing what you want a 6.6 and if he had a good heart but everything else wasnt good you could say 5.9
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  #6  
Old 04-30-2008, 12:18 PM
International Threat
 

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Guess this part was overlooked "Tongue Kisses 6.9."
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  #7  
Old 04-30-2008, 12:59 PM
Thats Mr. Oil Leak.....

 

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hahaha
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  #8  
Old 04-30-2008, 01:30 PM
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that is pretty funny lol
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  #9  
Old 04-30-2008, 01:40 PM
Learning the 6.0 game…...

 

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OMFG!
That is the funniest thing I've read in a while!
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