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06-01-2009, 08:42 AM
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Alcohol
Alcohol
Due to increasing products liability litigation, American Liquor Manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all bottles and cans: WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like an idiot. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again until your friends leave. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the heck happened to your pants. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other people around you without spitting. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers, resulting in you getting pulverized. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember). WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol will make you believe that you are tougher, smarter, faster and more handsome than some really, really big guy named TINY. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing with you. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause a disturbance in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear. WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy. 
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06-01-2009, 08:46 AM
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Quote:
 i can relate to alot of them
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06-01-2009, 08:56 AM
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thats funny right there......
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06-01-2009, 09:01 AM
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So since they are gonna be puttin all those warnings on the bottles does that mean bigger bottles/cans and more alcohol
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06-01-2009, 09:06 AM
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Well the plus side is they will have to make beer bottles and cans bigger to fit all that text on them.
I'm guilty of a few of them. 
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06-01-2009, 09:06 AM
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Tyler
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06-01-2009, 09:33 AM
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Thats funny right there 
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06-01-2009, 10:52 AM
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sounds about right
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06-01-2009, 11:02 AM
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lol. totally right.
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