My last trip to Costco - Ford Powerstroke Diesel Forum
Humor Jokes, Darwin Awards, Funny Vids and Pics - Keep 'em within the Powerstroke.org conduct

User Tag List

 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
post #1 of 7 Old 04-03-2013, 06:27 PM Thread Starter
Glow Plugs Only
 
dee004's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,442
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks: 1
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
My last trip to Costco

Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant? So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's *** and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was Laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the World to think of crazy things to say. Forward this (especially) to all your retired friends...it will be their laugh for the day!


05 F250 CCSB 4X4, 05 VW TDI
4"Banks Turbo Back, ARP Studs & OEM Gaskets,
Coolant Filter, Blue spring, Zoodad
Bypass Oil Filter, Kitty By By, Standpipes dummy plugs
BPD oil cooler, EGR Delete, CCV Mod, BPD Oil Cooler, SCT SF3

http://www.powerstroke.org/forum/gen...-endeavor.html


dee004 is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 7 Old 04-03-2013, 06:45 PM
Premium Member
 
'086.4LDiEsEl''s Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 731
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 2 Post(s)
Thanks: 29
Thanked 8 Times in 4 Posts
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Quote:
Originally Posted by dee004 View Post
Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant? So because I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's *** and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was Laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the World to think of crazy things to say. Forward this (especially) to all your retired friends...it will be their laugh for the day!
I'm going to have to believe your story, I'm 25 but have a friend in his 40's that will and has done somthing similar many times, and is so serious about it. We need people like you in this world, and Forum lots of humor I needed a laugh

Note: I've been known to be naive. dont me.
'086.4LDiEsEl' is offline  
post #3 of 7 Old 04-03-2013, 07:20 PM
Superduty Fanatic
 
'strokeboy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Cobb,WI
Posts: 30
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks: 1
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
that's pretty funny!

I'm A Ford Truck Man!

'strokeboy is offline  
post #4 of 7 Old 04-03-2013, 07:45 PM
Premium Member
 
1BADTON's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Salinas CA.
Posts: 406
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks: 3
Thanked 6 Times in 6 Posts
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Keep um going that was awsome. Brian

1BADTON
01,Lariat CCLB, 7.3L, 8" Donahoe on 37"s, John woods, ARBs, 4:88, Hansen's frt&rear, 15k Warn, HID's, DP Tunr 80econo, banks cooler, adreniline, msd dpi, optima's, autometers, more to come?
1BADTON is offline  
post #5 of 7 Old 04-03-2013, 10:14 PM
Compression Ignition Addict
 
F450Harley's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Rancho C. CA
Posts: 175
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks: 0
Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
This joke is so old Dee.....I bet you older than you.
But I gotta admit, first time I hear it with Costco in it (instead of Pet Store)......and I like it when you tell it in first person.
F450Harley is offline  
post #6 of 7 Old 04-03-2013, 10:45 PM
Member
 
03F350moneypit's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Hubbard, OHIO
Posts: 42
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
ha thats a good one


03 F350 6.uhohh 4x4 srw manual egr delete, and scangauge2. so far....
03F350moneypit is offline  
post #7 of 7 Old 05-23-2013, 11:40 PM
DERAIL MOD!!!


 
351fifty's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Canton and kennesaw
Posts: 23,174
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks: 34
Thanked 205 Times in 193 Posts
Feedback Score: 4 reviews
This is hilarious

-Kris-
2011 f150 ecoboost 4x4 323/452 on php dyno 11/16/13
1995 CCLB DRW 324K
2001 CCLB DRW 319K
Dp tuner infinity, exhaust, intake, chipped, tricked, and wrecked


Quote:
Originally Posted by marine5811
The stock downpipe in an OBS is flat because I'm a ginger.
Quote:
Originally Posted by alberta 7.3
Finding a decent woman is like shopping for a used truck. You spend most of your time picking through the money pits, wrecks, and basket cases until you find one that you can tolerate
Quote:
Originally Posted by JJFLASH
Well at least you caught the loose bolts before they cause any damage. Nothing worse than a sloppy hole
351fifty is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the Ford Powerstroke Diesel Forum forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode



Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome