the snow shoveler - Ford Powerstroke Diesel Forum
Humor Jokes, Darwin Awards, Funny Vids and Pics - Keep 'em within the conduct

User Tag List

LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
post #1 of 6 Old 12-22-2007, 12:14 PM Thread Starter
Super Moderator

Rob's Avatar
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Layton, Utah
Posts: 13,239
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks: 3
Thanked 7 Times in 4 Posts
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Send a message via AIM to Rob Send a message via MSN to Rob Send a message via Skype™ to Rob
the snow shoveler

December 8 -
6:00 PM It started to snow. The first
snow of the season and the wife and I took our
****tails and sat for hours by the window watching
the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. It
looked like a Grandma Moses Print. So romantic we
felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!

December 9-
We woke to a beautiful blanket of crystal
white snow covering every inch of the landscape.
What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely
place in the whole world? Moving here was the best
idea I've ever had! Shoveled for the first time in
years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and
closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a
perfect life!

December 12-
The sun has melted all our lovely snow.
Such a disappointment! Myneighbor tells me not to
worry- we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No
snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll
have so much snow by the end of winter, that I'll
never want to see snow again. I don't think that's
possible. Bob is such a nice man, I'm glad he's our

December 14-
Snow, lovely snow! 8 inches last night.
The temperature dropped to -20. The cold makes
everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away,
but I warmed up by shoveling the driveway and
sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplow came back
this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't
realize I would have to do quite this much
shoveling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this
way. I wish l wouldn't huff and puff so much.

December 15-
20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4
Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2
extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a
wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think
that's silly. We aren't in Alaska , after all.

December 16-
Ice storm this morning. Fell on my butt
on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt
like heck. The wife laughed for an hour, which I
think was very cruel.

December 17-
Still way below freezing. Roads are too
icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours.
I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing
to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate
her. Guess I should've bought a wood stove, but
won't admit it to her. God I hate it when she's
right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my
own living room.

December 20-
Electricity's back on, but had another 14 inches of
the dang stuff last night. More shoveling! Took all
day. The dang snowplow came by twice. Tried to find
a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they're too
busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called
the only hardware store around to see about buying a
snow blower and they're out. Might have another
shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I
have to shovel or the city will have it done and
bill me. I think he's lying.

December 22-
Bob was right about a white Christmas
because 13 more inches of the white stuff fell today,
and it's so cold, it probably won't melt till
August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to
go out to shovel and then I had to pee. By the time
I got undressed, peed and dressed again, I was too
tired to shovel. Tried to hire Bob who has a plow on
his truck for the rest of the winter, but he says
he's too busy. I think the idiot is lying.

December 23-
Only 2 inches of snow today. And it
warmed up to 0. The wife wanted me to decorate the
front of the house this morning. What is she, nuts?!! Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did but I think she's lying.

December 24-
6 inches - Snow packed so hard by snowplow, l broke
the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If
I ever catch the creep who drives that snow plow, I'll
drag him through the snow by his feet and beat him
to death with my broken shovel. I know he hides
around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at a 100 miles an hour and throws
snow all over where I've just been! Tonight the wife
wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open
our presents, but I was too busy watching for the
dang snowplow.

December 25-
Merry freaking Christmas! 20 more inches
of the dang slop tonight - Snowed in. The idea of
shoveling makes my blood boil. God, I hate the snow!
Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a
donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel.
The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's a
fricking idiot. If I have to watch 'It's A Wonderful Life' one more time, I'm
going to stuff her into the microwave.

December 26-
Still snowed in. Why the heck did I ever
move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting
on my nerves.

December 27-
Temperature dropped to -30 and the pipes
froze; plumber came after 14 hours of waiting for
him, he only charged me $1,400 to replace all my

December 28-
Warmed up to above -20. Still snowed in.
The WOMAN is driving me crazy!!!

December 29-
10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof
or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I
ever heard. How dumb does he think I am?

December 30-
Roof caved in. I beat up the snow plow
driver, and now he is suing me for a million
dollars, not only the beating I gave him, but also
for trying to shove the broken snow shovel up his
rear. The wife went home to her mother. Nine more
inches predicted.

December 31-
I set fire to what's left of the house. No more

January 8-
Feel so good. I just love those little
white pills they keep giving me. Why am I tied to
the bed?

Rob, The Investigator!
Audentes Fortuna Juvat
(Fortune Favors The Bold)
The Org. Staff reserves the right to
move, modify, delete or merge threads/posts
at our discretion, without explanation
at any time.

Rob is offline  
Sponsored Links
post #2 of 6 Old 12-22-2007, 12:35 PM
duct tape & zip ties

bigcountrysg's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Willis, MI
Posts: 10,761
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Send a message via Yahoo to bigcountrysg
I can relate to this. That was a great thing to read. Made me laugh thanks for sharing.

Your Actions Today, Decide Your Future Tomorrow

2005 6.0 Crew Cab Long Box Lariat, current truck

2004 6.0 destroyed by contaminated fuel

2002 7.3L burnt
bigcountrysg is offline  
post #3 of 6 Old 12-22-2007, 12:46 PM
Desert Shield/Storm Vet

vitalidle's Avatar
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Munising, MI.
Posts: 9,092
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Yeah I call that the grey look!!! It lasts about 6 months here in the U.P. We each take turns going on suicide watch!!!

2002 F-250 4x4 EC, SRW, SB
Auto 93,000 miles
DP Tuner F5
ATS Compressor and 1.0 Exhaust housing high flow back plate
Turbo Back 4" Silverline Exhaust Mbrp Muffler Delete
Isspro Trans,Pyro,Boost Triple Pod
Fumoto Oil Drain Valve
AIH Delete With Boost Fitting

vitalidle is offline  
post #4 of 6 Old 12-22-2007, 01:11 PM
Powerstroke Techie

Clay Henry's Avatar
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Tuttle, OK
Posts: 17,197
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks: 1
Thanked 13 Times in 11 Posts
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
LMAO...thats a goodun!

2003 6.0 F350 dually on high cholesterol fuel (WVO)
2000 7.3 Excursion also on a high cholesterol fuel

Clay Henry is offline  
post #5 of 6 Old 12-27-2007, 02:03 PM
Compression Ignition Addict
rankroddin250's Avatar
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: lewiston, Id.
Posts: 5,008
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Feedback Score: 1 reviews
I think ida quit shoveling snow by about the 9th. LOL

A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.
The People of a free country should not be scared of their government, the government should be scared of their people.

rankroddin250 is offline  
post #6 of 6 Old 12-29-2007, 06:42 AM
Compression Ignition Addict
stroker27's Avatar
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: SLC, Utah
Posts: 514
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Tagged: 0 Thread(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
lol... thats almost not quite right for Utah... its more like snowed for two days straight and got to -5, the next day it warmed up to 50 degress and melted everything, that night the low was -3 and turned everything to an ice skating rink, it snowed 1 inch hiding it all... the next day its 45 degrees....and so on... lol or like earlier this year. it snowed and the next week it was 65 degrees.... anyway, great post.

99.5/01 F250 SD 4x4 SOF ext. cab short bed
90,000 on the engine and 253 on the truck
Foil Delete...(no difference noticed)...
Gooseneck hitch
Tow package
Exhaust(kat and muffler delete)
2" leveling kit by AAA spring(local)
tranny w/triple disc tq
edge juice w/attitude
where has all my mileage gone....
stroker27 is offline  
Sponsored Links

Quick Reply

Register Now

In order to be able to post messages on the Ford Powerstroke Diesel Forum forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:


Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode

Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome