a couple of Hillary stories - Ford Powerstroke Diesel Forum
Humor Jokes, Darwin Awards, Funny Vids and Pics - Keep 'em within the Powerstroke.org conduct

 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
post #1 of 8 Old 09-11-2007, 07:16 PM Thread Starter
Compression Ignition Addict
 
bryanbrown's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Gainesville, COLLEGE STATION, Texas
Posts: 590
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
a couple of Hillary stories

Hillary Clinton was out jogging one morning along the parkway when she tripped, fell over the bridge railing and landed in the creek below.

Before the Secret Service guys could get to her 3 kids who were fishing pulled her out of the water. She was so grateful she offered the kids whatever they wanted.

The first kid says, "I want to go to Disneyland." Hillary says, "No problem. I'll send you there in my private jet. Bill and I have a condo in Maui and it's all yours for 3 weeks."

The second kid says, "I want a new pair of Nike Air Jordan's," Hillary says, "I'll get them for you and even have Michael sign them!!"

The third kid says, "I want a motorized wheelchair with a plug in for my Ipod so I can listen to music when I travel down the sidewalks."

Hillary is a little perplexed by this and says, "But you don't look like you're handicapped." The kid says, "When my dad finds out I saved you from drowning he'll kick my butt so hard I won't be able to walk for at least a year!!!"

##########################

When Bill and Hillary first got married Bill said, I am putting a box under the bed. You must promise never to look in it." In all their 30 years of marriage Hillary never looked.

However, on the afternoon of their 30th anniversary, curiosity got the best of her and she lifted the lid and peeked inside. In the box were 3 empty beer cans and $81,874.25 in cash.

She closed the box and put it back under the bed. Now that she knew what was in the box, she was doubly curious as to why. That evening they were out for a special dinner. After dinner Hillary could no longer contain her curiosity and she confessed, saying, "I am so sorry. For all these years I kept my promise and never looked into the box under our bed. However, today the temptation was too much and I gave in. But now I need to know, why do you keep the cans in the box?"

Bill thought for a while and said, "I guess after all these years you deserve to know the truth.

Whenever I was unfaithful to you I put an empty beer can in the box under the bed to remind myself not to do it again."

Hillary was shocked, but said, "Hmmm, Jennifer, Paula and Monica. I am very disappointed and saddened but temptation does happen and I guess that 3 times is not that bad considering 30 years."

They hugged and made their peace.

A little while later Hillary asked Bill, "So why do you have all that money in the box?"

Bill answered, "Well, whenever the box filled up with empty cans, I took them to the recycling center and redeemed them for cash."

'01 F350 2wd Lariat Dually 7.3 6sp-back to stock
'06 Dodge 4wd Dually, Auto, Edge Juice, AFE Bladerunner, 5" turbo back, BHAF
www.EmpireIronWorks.com


****SELLING ALL MY STUFF**NEARLY ALL GONE**PM IF INTERESTED IN ANYTHING***

Spearco 6.0 Retrofit I.C.- $800 shipped
coated uppipes(not bellowed)- $200 shipped
bryanbrown is offline  
post #2 of 8 Old 09-11-2007, 07:18 PM
Desert Shield/Storm Vet

 
vitalidle's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Munising, MI.
Posts: 9,092
Thanks: 0
Thanked 1 Time in 1 Post
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
HaHaHa

2002 F-250 4x4 EC, SRW, SB
Auto 93,000 miles
DP Tuner F5
ATS Compressor and 1.0 Exhaust housing high flow back plate
Turbo Back 4" Silverline Exhaust Mbrp Muffler Delete
Isspro Trans,Pyro,Boost Triple Pod
Fumoto Oil Drain Valve
AIH Delete With Boost Fitting

vitalidle is offline  
post #3 of 8 Old 09-11-2007, 07:19 PM
Rice Hunter
 
Diesel Freak's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Norfolk,VA...Near the beach
Posts: 4,036
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
:beer2::bluewink :

Lloyd Vice Director of Virginia Strokers
2006 F350 6.0L SuperDuty Lariat 4x4
Magnaflow 4" S.S. Turbo Back, Lost Cat, 5" S.S. Tip
Custom Tuned SCT
6" Fabtech 4-Link Suspension- Dirt Logic Shocks-Dual steering Stabilizers
S.S. Brake Lines
Fumoto oil Drain Valve
Accufab Polished Elbow
BFG 37"x12.5"x18" Load "D" All Terrains
ARP Head Studs
EGR Delete
'03 Turbo Swap


Diesel Freak is offline  
post #4 of 8 Old 09-11-2007, 07:29 PM
Compression Ignition Addict
 
bigred69's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Loma, Colorado
Posts: 256
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
My dad would be the s#!t out of me too! But if it were me I wouldn't have saved her, so I got no problems. LMAO

BIGRED69



7.3 Powerstroke (conversion in progress)
"IN GOD WE TRUST"
bigred69 is offline  
post #5 of 8 Old 09-12-2007, 03:45 AM
Banned
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Ponca City, Okla
Posts: 1,089
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Send a message via MSN to Blue01F250 Send a message via Yahoo to Blue01F250
hahahah - $$$ from recycled cans... !!!! hahahah
Blue01F250 is offline  
post #6 of 8 Old 09-12-2007, 03:54 AM
Banned
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: SOUTH New Jersey (there is a difference)
Posts: 0
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
hahaha to both! the first was awesome!


-nate
06TWO50Diesel is offline  
post #7 of 8 Old 09-12-2007, 04:11 AM
Compression Ignition Addict
 
DIESEL RACER's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Woodland, MI
Posts: 300
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Nice!
DIESEL RACER is offline  
post #8 of 8 Old 09-12-2007, 04:51 AM
Big Daddy!
 
robertcarmel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Spring/Tomball
Posts: 1,333
Thanks: 0
Thanked 0 Times in 0 Posts
Mentioned: 0 Post(s)
Quoted: 0 Post(s)
Feedback Score: 0 reviews
Quote:
Originally Posted by bryanbrown View Post
However, on the afternoon of their 30th anniversary, curiosity got the best of her and she lifted the lid and peeked inside. In the box were 3 empty beer cans and $81,874.25 in cash.
A little while later Hillary asked Bill, "So why do you have all that money in the box?"

Bill answered, "Well, whenever the box filled up with empty cans, I took them to the recycling center and redeemed them for cash."
I was thinking that was a lower number than what it REALLY is

I didn't think Hill liked men much anyhow?

Quote:
Originally Posted by cchase View Post
Do you know what the hardest part of driving a dodge is? Telling your parents that your gay.
Sold the truck to help pay $1.5M in medical bills! Now I have a F150 6cyl that is slower and gets worse mileage
robertcarmel is offline  
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the Ford Powerstroke Diesel Forum forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in









Human Verification

In order to verify that you are a human and not a spam bot, please enter the answer into the following box below based on the instructions contained in the graphic.



Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode



Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome