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  #1  
Old 08-24-2007, 09:36 PM
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Little Johnny Jokes

I tought it was about time to start up a thread with Little Johnny Jokes.

Here is my favorite.

Little Johnny is at school. The teacher says to the class " There are five crows on a fence. The farmer gets out his shotgun and shoots one of the crows off the fence. How many are left on the fence?"

Little Johnny raises his hand. Teacher calls on little Johnny and he says "None. When the farmer shot the gun all of the crows flew away."

The teacher says "Well Johnny, that is not the answer I was looking for. But I like the way you think."

Little Johnny says "I got one for you teacher. There are three ladies sitting on a park bench eating ice cream cones. The first one is licking the top of the cone. The second one is licking the side of the cone. And the third one is jamming the whole cone in her mouth. Which one is married?"

The teacher says "It's the one jamming the whole cone in her mouth."
Johnny says "No. It's the one with the ring on her finger. But I like the way you think."
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Old 08-24-2007, 09:37 PM
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Bada Boom!! That was a good one.
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Old 08-24-2007, 09:40 PM
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that is a good one
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Old 08-24-2007, 09:41 PM
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Good one. Here's another.

The teacher tells the class she wants to hear them use the word "rat" in a sentence. Of course, Johnny raises his hand. The teacher is afraid to call on him, but finally gives in. How could he possibly misuse the word "rat?"

Johnny stands up and says "This morning I saw a rat in the kitchen."

The teacher is relieved until he says "Yea, it was a big f***in rat with a tail this f***in long!"
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Old 08-24-2007, 09:47 PM
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LMAO - I love those!
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Old 08-24-2007, 09:49 PM
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yep...that's a good one too.

Little Johnny is playing with his wind up airplane in the back yard. He winds it up, throws it, when it lands he says " all you MFers getting off get off. All you MFers getting on get on." Johnny's mom hears this and sends him to his room. 30 minutes later she lets him go back out to play with his wind up airplane. This time Johnny winds it up and throws it, when it lands he says" all of you getting off get off. all of you getting on get on. all of you that want to complain about the delay talk to the beootch in the kitchen."
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Old 08-24-2007, 09:52 PM
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LOL...that's another good one!!!
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Old 08-24-2007, 10:30 PM
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So the teacher is in class one day and decides shes gonna make the kids use their brains. She says I have something that is long skinny and edible. Little Johny answers and says a banana and the teacher say no its a hot dog but I like the way you think. Little Johny says Ive got one for you. Sticks hios hand in his pocket and says I'm holding something round hard and has a head on it. Well The teacher says Johny to the principals office. Little Johny says no its a quarter but I like the way you think.
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Old 08-24-2007, 10:33 PM
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I have not heard that one....that is a good one.
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Old 08-24-2007, 10:48 PM
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lol... wow
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