WalMart has it ALL

**Big AL** · #1 (**permalink**) 06-26-2007, 06:21 PM

One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Chuck says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell." I guess I better go see a doctor.
"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. "There’s a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give it a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong in about 10 seconds and cost's ten dollars—a lot cheaper than a doctor." So Chuck deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. He deposits ten dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart."

That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Chuck began wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter, and a sperm sample for good measure. Chuck hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results. The computer prints the following:

1 Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9)

2 Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle 7)

3 Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab!

4 Your wife is pregnant, Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.

5 If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better. Thank you for shopping @ Wal-Mart