Me: "I'm using lots of oil all of the sudden-like a gallon per day."
Dealer: "We're all over it, you can trust us."
Me (a week later): "Any news on the truck?"
Dealer: "You need a turbo!"
Me: "How much is that?"
Dealer: "Bend Over this will hurt for a little while"
A few days pass.......
Me: "Can I pick up my truck?"
Dealer: "Bring briefcase-unmarked bills-come alone"
Me (drives away): clack clack clack
The next day, Me drives back to the dealer
Me: "Hey Bud, I'm still using about a gallon a day and I smell oil in the exhaust but not much smoke at all."
Me: "What's next?"
Dealer: "duhhhhhhhhhhh-we'll get back to you"
That night, Me joins Powerstroke.org and searches pursuant to symptoms...
Me: "Great Scott, I didn't need a turbo-just injector O-rings"
The next morning, Me calls the Dealer
Me: "Hey Bud, ever think about checking the injector O-Rings?"
Dealer: "We're all over it, you can trust us!"
A few days go by.....
Dealer: "great news Me, we found some bad O rings"
Me: " So that is where the oil was going"
Dealer: "Yep Definitely"
Me: " So I didn't need a turbo then?"
Dealer: "Uh.......Well.....yeah you needed one of those too."
Me: "Yeah, right whatever hawse, how about we put some new injectors in that truck since it's at about 200k. Might as well do it while they're out eh?"
Dealer: "Splendid idea"
Me: "Bout how much?"
Dealer "Since we misdiagnosed the turbo, we'll use lube this time"
Me: "Ok, but I'm low on unmarked hundreds and you guys kept my only briefcase..."
Dealer: "Sounds like a personal problem."
Me: "Let me think about it."
Shady service tech casually puffs on cigarette...
Shady Service Tech : "Pssssssst. Psssssst. Hey Bud.....I hear you're gonna spring for new injectors"
Me: "Maybe, But my anus still hurts from the turbo you guys put on last week"
Shady Service Tech: "Have you ever heard of Pensacola Diesel?"
Shady Service tech: " Well, they have injectors for less than half of what the stealership here wants." "It's called a Super Kit-Great Deal".
Me: "I'll give them a call."
Me walks out to the parking lot of the stealership and calls Pensacola.
Me returns to the shop a few minutes later.
Me: "Shady Service Tech you were right, that seems like a hell of a deal-they're on the way.
Shady Service Tech: "Awesome.....incidentally, your injectors (aside from the o-rings) don't look too bad. A buddy of mine has a 7.3 with 400k and really needs some injectors but can't afford them. How about I put your old injectors in his truck, and give you his as cores?" He'd probably go $250 for yours........."
Me: "I'll tell you what, if he needs them he can HAVE them. I don't really need the $250. "
Shady Service Tech "You're a cool dude" (thinking "what a ****ing moron" Me is)
A few more days pass and Me calls dealer
Me "How 'bout it?"
Me: "On my way"
Me arrives at the dealer and starts up his truck
Me: "IT"S REALLY LOUD"
Shady Service Tech: "YEAH, NEW INJECTORS ARE LIKE THAT BECAUSE THEY HIT HARDER"
Me: "SEEMS TO IDLE ROUGH"
Shady Service Tech: "IT'LL STRAIGHTEN OUT"
Me: "K.....I STILL SMELL OIL"
Shady Service Tech: "RESIDUAL LEFT IN THE SYSTEM FROM HYDROLOCK, IT"LL BURN OUT "
Me: "UHH K"
Me drives the truck to the shop and puts it back in fleet. A few days pass and Me is told truck is still using a quart per day. Me returns to Stealership with truck.
Me: "this thing is still burning up the oil"
Dealer "we'll take a look"
Me: "I can take it anywhere and have parts thrown at it-I brought it to the Dealer to have it diagnosed right and fixed properly the first time (Me *****es for a few minutes and starts to get a little excited and Me is a big dude). "I'd like to talk to the Service Manager"
Dealer: "Wait right here and I'll get him"
Me waits for many, many minutes
Dealer: "Service Manager is......uh.....well.......uh......what would you like us to do to make it right?"
Me: "Fix the ****in' thing"
Dealer (laughing) "No seriously....."
Me: "Whatever, I'm done here"
Me calls Pensacola Diesel and describes the problem.
Me: "Hey Bud, I bought some injectors there a while back and the truck runs like ****, and uses a quart of oil daily."
Pensacola: "I don't know what to tell you, could be any number of things but certainly not the injectors after all they're new (reman)"
Me: "K-Thanks for the help-not"
A few weeks pass and Me makes time to take the truck to Ford Dealer #2 and describes symptoms.
Dealer #2 : "The clowns at Dealer #1 improperly installed your injectors." "We had to replace o-rings"
Me: "OK great I'll assume the position to remit payment"
(Pig squealing sounds)
Me drives the truck to the shop and puts it back into the fleet. A few days go by and Me gets a call that the truck stopped fueling, oil is not visible on the stick and **** is just generally out of control. By this time, Me knows the drill so he buys all of 15w40 oil available in the County and nurses truck back to Dealer #1 (6 gallons of oil to go 25 miles) because they were the nearest.
Dealer: "Back again eh?" (Cha Ching)
Me: "Yep, how bout you guys really take a look at this thing"
Dealer: "We're all over it you can trust us"
Me: "Whatever, I'm not paying for **** this time-fix it or else!"
Dealer: "No need to get violent"
Me decides to double down and calls Pensacola Diesel again and describes the symptoms and the horrible oil consumption. Me explains that there is no blow by at all and that at this point all other related components have been replaced.
Me: "So what do you think?" "Bad Injectors"
Pensacola Diesel: "Absolutely not" "Did they check the flux capacitor?"
Me: "I've never heard of that." "What does it do?"
Pensacola Diesel: "Well, if it works properly, when you get the truck to 88 miles per hour you could go back in time and buy a gasser and avoid all of this ****"
Pensacola Diesel: "Or even go back further and find another occupation so you wouldn't need a pickup at all". "Like, maybe be a lawyer or something."
Me: " I don't think the truck will do 88"
Pensacola Diesel: "Sounds like a personal problem"
Me gives the stealership a few weeks and checks in.
Me: "How 'bout it Bud?"
Dealer: "Slightly low compression on cylinder 5, clearly you need a motor"
Me: "A motor?"
Me: "where'd the 6 gallons of oil go that I burned up in 25 miles"
Dealer: (Laughing) "No seriously you need a motor"
Me: "Did you bench test the injectors?"
Dealer: "With what?"
Me: "It was my understanding that any Ford dealer servicing diesel engines was mandated to have the equipment to bench test injectors"
Dealer: "That's silly ha ha."
Me: "I'm sending a wrecker"
Dealer: "How 'bout the bill"
Me: "Call my attorney"
Me takes the truck to a local independent shop who removes the injectors and sends them to a reputable diesel injection specialist out of State.
Me: "How 'bout those injectors Bud?"
Reputable Diesel Injection Specialist: "5 of 8 test bad for low fuel and internal o-ring failure." "Where did you get them?"
Me: "Pensacola Diesel....................."
Reputable Diesel Injection Specialist: "hahahahahahahahahahahahah there's your problem." "We replace theirs all the time."
Me calls Pensacola Diesel and is directed to whoever handles warranty returns.
Me: "Hey Bud, I've called several times and finally found out that your injectors are at the root of my ongoing problems"
Pensacola Diesel: "Noooooooooooooo
Me: "Yep, cost me a ****load of money too"
Pensacola Diesel: "Sounds like a personal problem, but send them back and we'll test them ourselves and see what's going on"
Me: "But you tested them the first time"
Pensacola Diesel: "Yep"
Me: "Well, that's the problem"
Pensacola Diesel: "Look, if they test bad, we'll send you 5 replacements"
Me: "K, but will they be yours or Alliant Power?"
Pensacola Diesel: "Ours of course"
Me: "How will I know they're good?"
Pensacola Diesel: "we test them"
Me: "But you tested the first batch you sent me"
Pensacola Diesel: "yep"
The saga continues......................................Tha nks for letting me vent.