When my truck was bone stock I tried to keep the boost under 25psi for prolonged periods of time. Getting on it for a little fun now and then I would hit 30-32. When I pulled a trailer I tried hard not to keep the boost over 25 going up hills and what not. My truck went 95,000 miles with no problems, I had money to do it so I put head studs in even though my head gaskets seemed to be holding up just fine.
As far as blowing off the intercooler piping, I bet the boots are soaked with oil from the CCV. If the boots are oil soaked, torn, or cracked you will probably have a hard time keeping them on when the boost builds. Check the condition of the boots, make sure they are clean, and reroute the CCV. That should solve the boot problems.